i wish.....

i just wish that i could blame GOD... for all of this instead to say thanks to all of His Blessings.. I wish that i could scream at someone at this time.. this moments when i feel like... im in serious trouble.. when im in despair.. i feel lost... AGAIN!!!.. dont know why.. i feel that all that ive gained suddenly dissapeared... now im back!... ive changed and now i feel like i used to be.. lost and vulnerable... or maybe thats what i am and i just dont realize??.. i dont know.. to much too explained but i even dont have a clue about it... honestly.. i dont even know why im writing this.. silly isnt it.. having a life that u dont have any clue about it.., cant think of nothin.. cant find nothing... walking nowhere... talk to no one... im starting to think who i am... who am i?? i wish that all this blur gone.. i wanna see the world again.. like u see.. like everyone see.. beautiful.. but i can see it anymore.. i always wish that i have another life... being someone else than me... i dont hate myself... i just dont like being me... oh, GOD...who is me.. here we are.,... back to some old question..i wish i dont even have to ask all of this... i need answer..!!!